Do I have to go to court?

In my Bay area family law practice, a common question that I hear at the beginning of my clients’ divorce cases is, “do I have to go to court to get divorced?” This question has a straightforward answer if you take it at face value. You can drive without getting a license, but you can’t do so legally. By the same token, you can get a divorce without going to court, but it won’t be legally binding. In the eyes of the law, you’d still be married.

Even if you and your spouse agree on the terms of your separation, you will need to file a Marital Settlement Agreement in court and attach it to a Judgment and several other mandated forms, which will all need to be approved by a judge. So, no, you can’t get divorced without the Court. But as you can tell from this example, going to court can be as blissfully boring as going to the DMV. So long as you fill out all the right forms, it should be a straightforward process. All the Court is doing is reviewing the agreements that you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse are making.

Some of my clients have learned the hard way that it makes more sense to hire my office to prepare their divorce paperwork, even if they and their ex agreed on everything. They’ve had their paperwork kicked back from the Court, sometimes several times, because of technical errors in the paperwork. They’ve gotten exhausted by the process, and the process has taken far longer than they expected. They decided to just hire a professional to handle it. My office is able and willing to assist, regardless of whether the situation is simply a matter of taking care of the paperwork.

There’s another side to the question, “do I have to go to court to get divorced?” Often, my clients can become concerned about getting stuck in a process over which they have no control, and this can include a fear of runaway litigation. I work together with my clients to determine a course of action that makes the most sense given what is taking place in their case at any given time. In some instances, asking the Court to help us move the case forward is the most cost-effective and time-sensitive route. For example, if the other side is using mediation in order to delay resolution of the case, asking the Court to help you resolve the issues is the most effective strategy. In other instances, where there are difficult issues facing you and your ex but where there is a willingness to make a deal, mediation is a very effective process.

People sometimes come to my office seeking the most aggressive attorney they can find. Being solely aggressive means that you have one tool in your tool belt. That tool – aggression – can lead a client into court battles that should have never been waged and cost him or her tens of thousands dollars for no reason. Our office is battle-ready to litigate any issue where it is in your interest to do so. But we have a wide range of skills, including understanding what battles are worth waging and what their likely outcome will be if litigated versus negotiated. We negotiate and litigate effectively. If you’re a wise consumer, you’ll be looking for someone who is aggressive when necessary and has their eyes trained on getting matters resolved.